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Michele Shilvock

Michele Shilvock

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Michele Shilvock

Whether a parent or an educator those hard and challenging moments where a child is elevated and you don’t know what to do can happen to all of us. Feeling that frustration towards a child and self-doubt in your own ability to navigate those difficult moments, questioning the very strategies you have read about and wondering if your approach is not the ideal one. As a behaviour analyst and parent coach with over 24 years experience I have seen how general strategies don’t work for everyone. This is what has led me to focus on creating a BRIDGE between adult and child, by developing a deep understanding for what is behind those outbursts and then developing a road map of strategies that are reflective of what is at the root. Drawing from research in fields including child development and behaviour I use a BRIDGE framework I have created that involves walking you through a deeper understanding of a child’s complex behaviours and building out a road map of strategies with emphasis not just on discipline but rather what can be done to prevent the occurrences and help deepen your connection and reduce stress by creating more calm. Emphasis is placed on preventative strategies vs. solely on reactive ones and is framed in a supportive manner to strengthen the bond you have with your child.

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Hi, I’m Michele!

I have a bachelor’s degree in Social Work and a Master’s in Special Education and spent the early years of my career path working with families of children with a wide variety of developmental and physical needs, providing 1:1 and small group support. Over time my career shifted to servicing families whose children were on the autism spectrum or who were experiencing behaviour…

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Advocacy at School /// While the school year will Advocacy at School ///

While the school year will soon be wrapping up this is a reminder that your voice as a parent can have impact. 

School teams are already thinking about next year and if you have concerns about where your child is placed you should reach out to your child’s school team or principal. 

What does reaching it out include?  It can help to start with a letter that details the type of teacher and learning environment that is best suited for your child and why. Be factual and clear with your request. Even consider including the name of a peer your child has a strong connection with. 

Why do this?  Because there are different teaching environments and styles for a reason, children learn differently and your voice matters. 

#parentadvocate #kidscanlearn #teachingkids #iep #schoolmeeting #parentingtips #parentingwithpresence #schoolteam #complexbehavioursupport #supportforkids #southrockmoms
Motherhood ///⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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There are many days that don’t go as planned, that are filled with more downs than ups but in the end motherhood is also full of beautiful moments. No matter how you  come into motherhood we are all here together. Supporting and cheering each other on. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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✨Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms  who were  here yesterday, are hear today or will be here tomorrow .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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#motherhood #southrockmons #mothersday #momlife #parentcoach #momsofinstagram #momhood #momtruths
Communication /// Everyone gets activated from ti Communication ///

Everyone gets activated from time to time, child and adult alike. But yelling at a child is the least likely way they will listen. They will hear you but are they listening. Not to mention they are learning that to be heard they must get loud. 

💫So what to do instead ?  Pause for just a moment, take a breath.  Wait till you and your child are calm to talk to listen. 

✨There is a difference between FIRM and YELL ( more to come on this 😉)

💫 Be sure to save this reminder on those days you need it most😊

#communicationwithkids #talkingtokids #kidsmentalhealth #consciousparenting #parentlife #parentcoach #parenttips #southrockmoms
COLLABORATION /// ​​​​​​​​​ Ofte COLLABORATION /// ​​​​​​​​​
Often the most well intended strategies to support challenges a child is experiencing fall short.  Why?  Because the child was not included in the strategy. 

You see not all children respond the same way to a tool.  They might benefit from it, but they may not welcome it.  So to assume a strategy will work without including a child may be the reason it doesn't. 

So the next time you look to bring a tool ( a visual schedule, a timer, a chart, etc...) talk with a child to see if they will use the tool. 

Common reasons I hear that a child doesn't use a tool that is presented without collaboration:
* "It made me look different from the kids in class"
* "I didn't want my friends to see the chart when they came over"
* "I don't like pictures- I would prefer words"
* "That timer distracts me"
* "I don't like those fidgets, that's not what calms me"

* A reminder to take a moment to include a child more often than you don't .  When you collaborate, you will be supervised at just how much buy-in you will have. 

#parenting #parentssupportingparents #southrockmoms  #parentcoach #neurodivergent #adhd #parentlife #vancouvermoms #positiveparentingtips #childhood #parentchildconnection #micheleshilvockconsulting #complexbehaviour #parentingtip #parentcoaching #valuesbased #behavioranalyst #childhood #parentingmoments  #instagrammom #momsupportingmoms #collaboration #thisisparenthood #connecting #fraservalleymoms
Filling your child’s cup /// A reminder that th Filling your child’s cup ///

A reminder that the invest in connection with a child does not require big gestures. 
✨ instead filling their cup involves YOU being available during the moments THEY VALUE 😊

This doesn’t mean their won’t be hard moments but it does help in building trust and rapport for those teaching and supporting moments. 

👌🏻 save this reminder when you are feeling discouraged.

#parentlife #supportingkids #connectionwithkids #parenthack #educators #parentcoach #bucketfiller #connectionmatters #childhood #teachingkids #parentingwithpresence
Compassion /// for the missteps​​​​​​​​
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A reminder in your parenting journey that mistakes are made that's what makes us human.  Even the best of days may feel hard.  Part of parenting isn't just teaching your child to feel all the feelings, but to also allow yourself to feel them. ​​​​​​​​
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💫So remember self-care is an important piece of maintaining your own regulation in the day.​​​​​​​​
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#parentlife #parentingmoments #parentingtips #mindfulnesspractice #parentcoach #mamassupportingmamas #southrockmoms #parenthack #selfcare 

(📸 @sbuchananmedia )
Understanding ///⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Behaviours happen for different reasons and under different circumstances. That's why there is no one size fits all to responding.  Yes, the less complex ones, often the ones that are part of a stage of development or have a clear root can be responded in a more general way, but even those require some understanding and identification of why, THE ROOT.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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This is a reminder that when the actions a chid exhibits become more complex, or those general strategies just don't seem to be working, look for a deeper understanding.  When you know the ROOTS you can develop strategies that are supportive to that child and the space and strategies that are far more likely to have a lasting positive impact.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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It's all about BRIDGING the understanding to the strategies.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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#parenttip #helpiingkids #parenting #parentssupportingparents #southrockmoms  #parentcoach #neurodivergent #parentlife #vancouvermoms #positiveparentingtips  #parentchildconnection #micheleshilvockconsulting  #parentingtip #parentcoaching #valuesbased #behavioranalyst  #parentingmoments  #instagrammom #canadianmom #simplemotherhood #momsupportingmoms #modernparenting #thisisparenthood #connecting #fraservalley #momtime
Modelling /// I was reminding this morning about Modelling ///

I was reminding this morning about the power of modelling. As I prepared to leave for a day of silent meditation my little wanted to learn more and asked how she could join.  We then spent the next few mins talking and practicing before I left.  I reminded her how meditation helps me keep calm and that I am always learning and practicing. 😊

The idea from this is the reminder that children are always watching, curious and learning. 

If we want them to learn the tools for regulation then let’s ensure we start with modelling them in our own actions and behaviours and not just focus on teaching them. So much learning happens when children model what they see. A regulated child often involves a regulated big person. 

💫 encouraging everyone this weekend to find moments to calm themselves and model and support for their children 

#mindfulparenting #acceptancecommitmenttherapy #conciousparenting #parenting #parentsupport #raisingkids #parentcoach
Strategies in parenting /// ✨this is a reminder Strategies in parenting ///

✨this is a reminder that when utilizing a new strategy with children it can take time. I mean 1 week, 2 weeks … time to see a consistent shift. So as the saying goes ..” if at first you don’t succeed keep trying”. 

Children aren’t robots, so simply removing a screen, setting up an invitation to play or even setting up daily connection time isn’t going to likely see the effect you are after immediately. It takes:
💫time
💫consistency 
💫the right strategy 

✨ be sure to save and share this with someone who is needing this reminder 

#parenttips #parentingtips #parentcoach #behavioranalyst #responsiveness #parentlife #southrockmoms
Another trip around the sun /// With so many new Another trip around the sun ///

With so many new faces around here I thought I might take a moment to say HI🤗 and share a little about me and this space 

I’m a business owner, mom, wife,meditation❤️, and find so much joy in connecting with and supporting others around the journey of parenting and supporting the complex needs of children. 

I created this space to remind everyone who lands here that:

✨you are doing the very best with the knowledge and tools you have  as a parent 
✨parenting is not perfection 
✨understanding what is at the roots of complex behaviour in children is far more likely to see a child grow in positive ways long-term

My intention in this space is to 
✨ support your growth
✨ support your confidence and trust in self 
✨ BRIDGE that strength into supporting the complex behaviour needs children may be experiencing
✨ and do so without judgement 

 
So thank you for being part of this growing community and can’t wait to share so much of what I av planned for this new trip around the sun ☀️🎂

#community #parentcoach #behaviouranalyst #southrockmoms  #parentsupport #parentlife #complexbehavioursupport #micheleshilvockconsulting #consciousparenting
© Copyright Michele Shilvock 2023.