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Michele Shilvock

Michele Shilvock

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Michele Shilvock

Whether a parent or an educator those hard and challenging moments where a child is elevated and you don’t know what to do can happen to all of us. Feeling that frustration towards a child and self-doubt in your own ability to navigate those difficult moments, questioning the very strategies you have read about and wondering if your approach is not the ideal one. As a behaviour analyst and parent coach with over 24 years experience I have seen how general strategies don’t work for everyone. This is what has led me to focus on creating a BRIDGE between adult and child, by developing a deep understanding for what is behind those outbursts and then developing a road map of strategies that are reflective of what is at the root. Drawing from research in fields including child development and behaviour I use a BRIDGE framework I have created that involves walking you through a deeper understanding of a child’s complex behaviours and building out a road map of strategies with emphasis not just on discipline but rather what can be done to prevent the occurrences and help deepen your connection and reduce stress by creating more calm. Emphasis is placed on preventative strategies vs. solely on reactive ones and is framed in a supportive manner to strengthen the bond you have with your child.

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Hi, I’m Michele!

I have a bachelor’s degree in Social Work and a Master’s in Special Education and spent the early years of my career path working with families of children with a wide variety of developmental and physical needs, providing 1:1 and small group support. Over time my career shifted to servicing families whose children were on the autism spectrum or who were experiencing behaviour…

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International Women’s Day /// Girls have the ca International Women’s Day ///

Girls have the capacity to do great. It’s up to the big people to continue to create the space for girls to grow and reach.  To be reminded they CAN.

Thank you to all the women who have created the space both big and small. Your impact is great even if no one is telling you so. 
I am ❤️✨

#internationalwomensday #womensupportingwomen #momsupportingmoms #girlsgrowstrong #equality #parentcoach #momsofinatagram #womenleaders
Complex behaviours /// 💫A reminder that you m Complex behaviours ///
 
💫A reminder that you might not have all the answers for why a child does what they do and that is ok. It can help to bring in a fresh perspective and someone with training and understanding for the roots behind a behaviour. 

➡️ Reach out and let’s navigate the nuances specific to your child together and bridge that understanding to science back strategies. 

#teachingkids #complexbehavioursupport #behaviours #functionalassessment #behavioranalyst #parentcoach #parentingishard #parentingishardsometimes #parentlife #southrockmoms #supportingparents #parentcoach
Compassion for self /// Parenting is full of ups Compassion for self ///

Parenting is full of ups and downs and when you let messages out there guide you into questioning what you are doing it is easy to spiral down a deep hole of self doubt.  There may be room to adjust but the goal is for it to come from sound research backed sources. 

💫So today I am reminding you. There is no one way to parent children and each child may need different things from you.  Know that you are doing the very best you can with the tools you have and there is no shame in reaching out for extra support when you need it.  Strategies are intended to help not hurt you. YOU GOT THIS!!

#parentinglife #parenttips #southrockmoms #vancouvermoms #parenthood #behavioranalyst #parentcoach  #parentingtips
Being available /// Children are watching, they a Being available ///

Children are watching, they are processing and they are taking in. They are noticing when big people are not available to them and how they may be available to another instead. Who is that other? Often it’s their work or even simply stress. 

It’s amazing how one’s stress can make them unavailable for those moments with a child. So what can you do?

✨Become more aware - are you often checking your phone when with your child, are you distracted, are you not responding till your child gets loud. 

✨ set conscious time every day for 1:1 with your child. Doesn’t hVe to be a lot but it does have to be child directed and void of distraction. 

💫while you might not be able to get rid of all the daily stress you carry, moments of availability with a child can go a long way towards a more positive day and a day where a child feels seen and heard. 

#connection #parenting #parentingtips #parentcoach #childhood #consciouskids #consciousparenting #supportingkids #momssupportingmoms #southrockmoms #vancouvermoms
Let’s talk how we talk to kids /// Processing t Let’s talk how we talk to kids ///

Processing time and filtering information can be difficult for many. But neurodivergent children in particular can be impacted more. So what happens when people rapid fire too many instructions, too fast or with words a child doesn’t understand?  Well they might stop and let you know they are confused, but most of the time they will avoid (ignore, walk away, pretend they understand to get you to stop, or even avoid all together. 

It takes awareness, understanding and courage to say you need help. So the next time you are asking if a child who is not responsive as you expected, ask yourself:

✨do they understand what I am saying 
✨ am I talking too fast 
✨ are there too many steps
✨ are they focused elsewhere. 

💫Setting a child up for success is about what we do more than what they do.  Let me know if you agree ⬇️

#adhd #processingtime #neurodiversity #teachingkids #kidscanlearn #autism #parenthood #educators #teachingkids #parentcoach #parenttips #talkingtokids
Escalated children /// how we respond This is re Escalated children /// how we respond 

This is reminder that children’s behaviours are as nuanced as they are, that’s why it’s a disservice to say there is ONE way to respond. The reality, there isn’t. 

That’s why I continue to advocate for every adult to take the time to understand deeper, at the roots, why a child is dysregulated and what THEY need. It’s not what we think they need, but what they are seeking and needing. And if it’s space and quiet vs physical contact and statements of “you are mad” that is ok. 

💫 This can include asking a child when they are calm what they want when upset. 

✨ Don’t be discouraged when an approach isn’t received well, another is likely better suited. 

✨✨Give some ❤️ below if you agree 

#parentproblems #parentlife #parenthood #parentingtips #behavioranalyst #supportingkids #parentcoach #complexbehaviour #kidsdeserveit #southrockmoms #vancouvermoms #momsupportingmoms
School Goals /// ✨A reminder that you are the p School Goals ///

✨A reminder that you are the parent / caregiver and even your child are entitled to be part of the goal setting for your child for the year. 

Goals work best when everyone is on the same page.  The more children are aware the more likely they can let you know what goals are important to them and strategies they are receptive to. 

💡If you are running into problems at school with collaborative goal setting please reach out. 

#iep #schoolgoals #supportingstudents #kidscanlearn #teachingkids #parentcoach #educationconsultant #neurodivergent #adhd #asd #odd #learningdisabilities #vancouvermoms #southrockmoms
Reinforcement /// It’s ok to use it! We have to Reinforcement /// It’s ok to use it!

We have to start to stop shaming and putting fear into adults for using reinforcement. There are nuances to behaviour that make it so that things shouldn’t be black and white. When we take the time to understand the neuroscience behind what children do and the diverse ways many learn and engage, we are far more likely to be open to the understanding that motivating children is often an integral part to them learning skills.  This is especially true when we are talking about neurodivergent children. 

#reinforcement #reinforcementbenefits #nothingwrongwithmotivation #neurodivergent #teachingkids #kidscanlearn #supportingstudents #adhd #asd #motivationinkids #behaviouranalysis #childdevelopment #neuroscience
Support At School /// As children develop a sense Support At School ///

As children develop a sense for what might work for them it really helps to include them in the strategies to accommodate. What might make sense for the big people does not always make sense for children. Sometimes they have ideas for what will help them that adults never thought of. The more buy-in from a child to the tool, the more likely it is to be beneficial. So when you, talk to kids and explain and leave room for collaboration. 

Do you agree?

#accomodation #schoollearning #teachingkids #collaborations #neurodivergent #supportingkids #helpingkids #adhd #asd #autism #parenting #schoolsupport
Edited … be sure to have your audio on for this Edited … be sure to have your audio on for this one 😉

A Top Tips /// Student Edition

✨ Before jumping into the strategies a reminder to first understand what is behind the challenge. Most often there are lagging skills, skills not yet developed that will require support and coaching to make the best connections and strategies be successful for that child.  Tools are great but not without a full understanding and not all tools work for all kids and some, like withholding recess should just veneer be utilize 😉

💫 share this with someone who might need it today 

#teachingkids #parenttip #educators #supportingstudents #supportingkids #childdevelopment #neurodivergent #southrockmoms #bcmoms #parenting #understandingbehaviour
© Copyright Michele Shilvock 2023.